Olivia Bowen has broken her silence on the devastating loss of her baby as she detailed the ‘excruciating pain’ in a heartbreaking post on Instagram on Sunday.

The Love Island star, 30, announced that she was expecting her second child with  her husband Alex Bowen, 33, in February.

But earlier this week, Olivia revealed she was pregnant with twins but sadly lost one of her babies eight weeks into her pregnancy.

Speaking about the traumatic experience for the first time on her social media, Olivia shared an emotional update with fans, admitting: ‘We never want our sunset baby to be forgotten’.

She wrote: ‘I’ve tried to write this in my head a thousand times & now it’s come to the time to actually write it, it’s so hard to put everything I’m feeling into one. 

‘There isn’t many words I can find to explain the emotions we’ve been carrying – but all I knew from the moment I found the strength to say it out loud was that I wanted to share our story to connect with parents out there, like us, who have been through the same heartbreak & pain.

Olivia Bowen, 31, has broken her silence on the devastating loss of her baby as she detailed the ‘excruciating pain’ in a heartbreaking post on Instagram on Sunday 

The Love Island star announced that she was expecting her second child with her husband Alex Bowen, 33, in February

But earlier this week, Olivia revealed she was pregnant with twins but sadly lost one of her babies eight weeks into her pregnancy

‘You’re not alone, even when it feels like you are the loneliest person in the world. And if by telling our story, it helps just one person to feel they can get through it too, that’s what matters.

‘I couldn’t wrap my head around the happiness & joy I felt for having one safe healthy baby – I know how fortunate we are for that – but at the exact same time feeling the excruciating pain & trauma of losing their twin. It’s like the two couldn’t co exist.

‘But I want anyone who is going through this to know that it is ok to feel every single emotion you need to feel, as that’s how you will start to heal. 

‘There are some incredible charities who are there to help too like @tommys & @sandscharity.

‘The other reason we are sharing this is because we never want our sunset baby to be forgotten.

‘You existed, you were loved & you were part of our family for a short while. And you are forever now a part of our story & we will never forget you. This is all in your honour baby.’

In a new interview with The Sun, she explained how the couple were told they were having twins just before Christmas, when they attended an early six week scan.

Despite twins running in her family, Olivia had never expected it to happen and was shocked as the couple had only ever planned to have two children – but Alex reᴀssured her they would be able cope as a family of five. 

Olivia explained how the couple were told they were having twins just before Christmas , when they attended an early six week scan 

Olivia initially announced her pregnancy with a heartwarming video on Instagram and wrote in the caption: ‘A moment, a love- baby no2 – we’re waiting for you’ 

The couple, who have been together for almost a decade, welcomed their first child, son Abel, two, back in June 2022

However, Olivia and Alex received the heart-wrenching news when they returned two weeks later to make sure the smaller baby was growing.

Olivia got emotional as she recalled: ‘As we looked at the screen, you could see that one baby was so much bigger than the other. And then the sonographer told us that the smaller baby had no heartbeat.

‘I just didn’t believe it. I sat there thinking: ‘No, it’s going to come back.’ And what made me more upset was seeing Alex’s face, because he had been so positive.’ 

She admitted that Alex was ‘crushed’ and she was ‘numb,’ adding that she couldn’t get out of bed, brush her teeth or shower.

Olivia continued: ‘I was a mess and couldn’t speak to anyone. I just wanted to be asleep, but then I would feel so guilty because there was this other little baby thriving inside me that other people literally dream of having.’

The star had experienced vanishing twin syndrome, which occurs when one twin pᴀsses away in the womb and ‘vanishes’ and studies suggest happens in roughly 36% of twin pregnancies.

In the interview, Olivia added that she now hopes to fundraise for charities like Tommys, Sands, and Footprints. She also went to therapy to help cope with her loss.

Olivia initially announced her pregnancy with a heartwarming video on Instagram and wrote in the caption: ‘A moment, a love- baby no2 – we’re waiting for you.’ 

Olivia showed off her blossoming baby bump in multiple clips of the video, as the family prepare to become a four 

Read More Olivia Bowen shares sweet clip of the moment she told her husband Alex she was pregnant

The sweet clip, which looks like it had been recorded on a camcorder, showed the moment the couple find out they were pregnant.

It also featured adorable family moments between Olivia and Alex, and their son Abel, including the little one kissing his mother’s stomach and wearing a shirt that reads ‘big brother’.

Olivia showed off her blossoming baby bump in multiple clips of the video, as the family prepare to become a four.

The couple, who have been together for almost a decade, welcomed their first child, son Abel, two, back in June 2022.

Olivia and Alex, formerly a sales executive and scaffolder respectively, soared to fame in 2016 when they appeared on the ITV2 reality show, where she was an original star and he, a late and extremely popular entrant.

After leaving the villa their romance soon went from strength to strength and Alex popped the question in New York in December 2016.

They tied the knot at an idyllic EsSєx ceremony in September 2018.

After leaving the show, the couple earned thousands through brand deals and even had their own TV show, Olivia and Alex Said Yes, on TLC in 2018.

Olivia and Alex, formerly a sales executive and scaffolder respectively, soared to fame in 2016 when they appeared on the ITV2 reality show, where she was an original star and he, a late and extremely popular entrant

Following the birth of her first child, Olivia admitted that she ‘really really struggled’ with her postpartum figure so much so that she ‘hated’ herself ‘beyond belief’.

In a candid and emotional chat with Giovanna Fletcher on her Happy Mum, Happy Baby podcast in November, Olivia told how she ‘knew’ she’d struggle to with the look of her body after giving birth, with the star constantly comparing herself to other new mums.

Discussing her post-pregnancy figure, she said: ‘So I knew when I got pregnant that was something that I would just lose my s**t over after. I really… I still struggle with it

‘But after I hated myself like beyond belief. Like really, really struggled with my body image. Pregnant – loved, loved, loved it. And then the minute, that minute Abel was born and I was looking at myself in a completely different light, which makes no sense.

‘The fact that you can look at yourself when you’re pregnant and absolutely love the way you look and think, “wow, I’m incredible. I’m carrying this baby”. But then after it was like I was comparing myself to other girls that were in the public eye, that had had kids around the same time as me.

‘And I was looking at them thinking, “oh my God, you look amazing” and not thinking about myself and thinking, “I need to bounce back”.’

After convincing herself that she didn’t look great in comparison to others, Olivia embarked on a gruelling exercise routine – which would prove to have a negative effect on her body.

She explained: ‘I ended up actually really injuring myself because I had a complicated birth. 

After the birth of her first child, Olivia admitted that she ‘really really struggled’ with her postpartum figure so much so that she ‘hated’ herself ‘beyond belief’ 

Speaking of postnatal depression, Olivia explained: ‘I think it I think it is like the lost feeling afterwards. Like I think that postnatal is just so, so common and we don’t even realize it’

‘I started running too early because I was so conscious of what I looked like. I ended up breaking my sтιтches. I ended up… I horse rode too early because I wanted to get fit again, and I caused myself a lot of damage.

‘Not going into too much detail, but I ended up, like, actually really hurting myself from wanting to bounce back.’

But despite causing herself physical pain through her actions, the influencer confessed that she would probably still do the same thing again if they had another child.

WHAT IS VANISHING TWIN SYNDROME? 

Vanishing twin syndrome occurs when one twin pᴀsses away in the womb and ‘vanishes’.

The loss of a twin is expected in seven to 40 per cent of natural pregnancies, according to Seattle Children’s Hospital.

Vanishing twin syndrome is believed to occur in between 20 to 30 percent of multiple pregnancies.

It usually occurs in the first trimester and less frequently in later pregnancy. 

The cause is unknown, but theories suggest there are abnormalities in the way the baby implants or in the baby’s chromosomes. 

The lost baby is usually ‘absorbed’ by the mother. But sometimes the baby becomes ‘mummified’ and flattened due to the pressure of the surviving twin, and must be born. 

Often, vanishing twin syndrome has no symptoms, but some mothers experience cramping, bleeding, pelvic pain or decreasing hormone levels. 

If the twin dies in the second or third trimester, there are increased risks to the surviving fetus, including a higher rate of cerebral palsy.  

 This is due to a complicated process whereby the blood flow becomes restricted to the brain, causing damage, as a result of the other twin dying. 

The surviving twin may be born early or even miscarry if their twin vanished in the third trimester. 

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She said: ‘It was like… and even now, I think I still wouldn’t have done it differently. Really, the first time around… The second… If I got pregnant again, I know to look after myself, but I know for a fact I would have done that again and again and again.

‘Like that wouldn’t have changed. But I guess it is, you know, my job is on social media. And to see all these girls look so incredible and think that you don’t look like that.

‘It was such a hard thing. And because I’d always had such great body confidence and I loved my body, that was just someone I didn’t really recognize and I had no respect for. And it’s, it’s so sad.’

While Olivia struggled with her body image, she also faced a battle with postnatal depression.

Opening up to Giovanna on not feeling like a mother when Abel was born, she said: ‘I remember writing in my notes, actually, I think he was about three months old, and I remember writing in my notes that I didn’t want to be looked at as a mum.

‘I was like, I’m not a mum, I don’t feel like a mum. I have a baby and I love my baby, but I do not want anyone to look at me or call me mum.

‘I didn’t like it when people referred to me as mum. I hated it.’

As Giovanna suggested it was due to Olivia perhaps feeling ‘lost’ amid the traumatic birth, Olivia explained: ‘I think it I think it is like the lost feeling afterwards. Like I think that postnatal is just so, so common and we don’t even realize it. And I really struggled after, like anxiety wise, I was really depressive.

‘And I do think I was just shunning the image of being a mom because I just so wasn’t ready to give up who I was before, and I felt like I’d lost my whole idenтιтy. I had no clue who I was. Yeah, like I remember talking to my friends and being like, I literally don’t know who I am.

‘Like, I could not tell you one thing about myself and to lose yourself like that deeply. And then I think I’ve always. Because I didn’t want kids, I always looked at being a mom as not a bad thing, but just something that was never me.’ 

If you have been affected by this story, you can seek advice at www.miscarriageᴀssociation.org.uk or www.tommys.org or by calling 01924 200 799