Lottie Tomlinson admitted her cosmetic procedures became a ‘never-ending cycle’ as she candidly opened up about using filler and having beauty treatments on Tuesday. 

The influencer, 26, has had her lip and cheek filler dissolved and previously said she noticed the cosmetic procedures had ‘got out of control’. 

Now Lottie has revealed that she first turned to cosmetic treatments after ‘losing her confidence’ after her mum Johannah Deakin’s death in 2016 at the age of 43.

The sister of One Direction singer Louis Tomlinson said she believes her mum ‘sugarcoated’ her diagnosis and she never realised ‘how bad’ she was until near the end. 

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Lottie Tomlinson admitted her cosmetic procedures became a ‘never-ending cycle’ as she candidly opened up about using filler and having beauty treatments on Tuesday

The influencer, 26, has had her lip and cheek filler dissolved and previously said she noticed the cosmetic procedures had ‘got out of control’; pictured 2021

Speaking to Giovanna Fletcher on her Happy Mum Happy Baby podcast, she revealed that becoming a mother herself has changed the way she views herself and given her her confidence back. 

Lottie said: ‘I felt like it was making me happy, you know? Losing the weight and feeling slimmer definitely made me feel better in myself. But in terms of the fillers and the beauty treatments, it was just a never-ending thing of trying to catch up with yourself. 

‘And, like, when you lose someone as close as your mum, it affects your confidence a lot. 

‘That’s something I never expected, because if you think about it, your mum is the one person that cheers you on, that loves you unconditionally, that’s there to give you that, you know, reᴀssurance and support.

‘So when you lose that, you kind of lose that, you know, confidence in yourself.

‘So I think I was constantly chasing, trying to find that confidence, thinking I would find it in these, you know, fillers and how I looked.’

Lottie is now a proud mum of two children, son Lucky, two, and four month old daughter Flossie, who she shares with fiancé Lewis Burton.

She continued: ‘But I think what’s genuinely given me my confidence is having my kids, because you just realise that it’s not important, you know.

Now Lottie has revealed that she first turned to cosmetic treatments following ‘losing her confidence’ after her mum Johannah Deakin’s death in 2016 at the age of 43; pictured with brother Louis

The sister of One Direction singer Louis said she believes her mum ‘sugarcoated’ her diagnosis and she never realised ‘how bad’ she was until near the end

Speaking to Giovanna Fletcher on her Happy Mum Happy Baby podcast, she revealed that becoming a mother herself has changed the way she views herself and given her her confidence back

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‘I still like to look nice, I still like to get my hair done’, she added.

Her mother Johannah died from leukaemia aged 43 after she was diagnosed in 2016 when Lottie was just 18 years old.

Lottie said her mum hid how ill she was to ‘protect’ her seven children and when she did die it was a complete ‘shock’ to them all. 

She continued: ‘Looking back, she probably sugarcoated the situation because she wanted to protect us, which I understand. But then, when it came down to it, the last few weeks, you know, that’s kind of the only time we kind of started to realise that this… you know, she wasn’t going to be okay. 

‘And so to lose, to lose her, that… it felt sudden, do you know what I mean? Because the build-up—we had so much hope, you know, that she was going to be okay. And I think you’ve got to hold on to hope when someone’s ill.  

‘And she was so strong, she didn’t want anyone to know she was ill. She said she was going to fight it, and it was going to be okay. And so we were just, you know, we… that was our mum, we’d take her word for that. And she’d always been right about things. 

‘So, yeah, to lose, to lose her like that suddenly was just… it was just such a, like, shock. And it’s like the centre of everything, you know, it’s gone. It’s like everything else falls apart, and I feel like we’ve just spent, you know, the last few years since it all happened, just trying to rebuild that. 

‘And it’s not been easy, but we’ve just stuck together as a family, and we’ve tried to, you know, look after each other. And I think we’re getting there. We’re rebuilding everything. And it’s just sad that she’s not here with us.’ 

Johannah and Lottie’s father, who she was estranged from, had split up four years before and her mother’s death prompted her move home to Doncaster to look after her younger siblings with her grandparents. 

She said: ‘In terms of the fillers and the beauty treatments, it was just a never-ending thing of trying to catch up with yourself. And when you lose someone as close as your mum, it affects your confidence a lot’; pictured 2021

Lottie said her mum hid how ill she was to ‘protect’ her seven children and when she did die it was a complete ‘shock’ to them all; pictured L-R Louis, Felicite, Lottie, twins Phoebe and Daisy 

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Johannah had seven children, Louis, 31, Lottie, 26, Félicité, twins Phoebe and Daisy, 21, and twins Ernest and Doris, 11. 

Lottie said: ‘Because they were two [Ernest and Doris]. And, like, that’s what hurts the most when I speak about it is because Lucky’s two now. I don’t want to get upset, but the thought of having to leave him now, like, you know, it’s… I just needed to be there for them, you know? 

‘Because losing a mum at that age is just so, so sad and traumatising for them, you know? And I think Lucky is such a mummy’s boy, and he’s so attached to me. So, like, just putting myself in that situation, which you naturally do, I just couldn’t imagine, like, for him, if I wasn’t there now. 

‘But hopefully, me being there for them might have, you know, closed that gap for them a little bit. And that’s just what I wanted to do.’

Sadly for the family, Lottie’s sister Félicité Tomlinson lost her life following an accidental overdose three years later, after taking a fatal concoction of anti-anxiety medication, cocaine and painkillers.

Before the double tragedy, Lottie was working as a make-up artist alongside her friend Lou Teasdale, and by 2015 she was on tour with her brother Louis’ band One Direction.

Download Giovanna Fletcher’s Happy Mum Happy Baby podcast every Tuesday at 6am from acast.com