Sat on the couch with a bag of popcorn and a glᴀss of wine in hand, I have often dubbed myself a confident TV quiz player.
But during a behind-the-scenes visit to the set of Bridge Of Lies, hosted by Ross Kemp, I was quickly served a slice of humble pie.
As I routinely sit and shout answers – usually the right ones – at the telly box, I have admittedly been left in disbelief by some simple answers the public gets wrong.
And after watching the filming of an upcoming celebrity episode, I was in a frenzy when well-established music icons couldn’t spout simple trivia about the UK top 40s.
In hindsight, this should have been my first clue that when you are put face-to-face with Ross in the studio, your confidence, knowledge and ability to think simply wash away.
But no, after I watch the fabulous group of celebs barely get through with some cash, I still felt confident as ever ahead of my turn on the bridge.
Sat on the couch with a bag of popcorn and a glᴀss of wine in hand, I have often dubbed myself a confident TV quiz player
As I routinely sit and shout answers – usually the right ones – at the telly box, I have admittedly been left in disbelief by some simple answers the public gets wrong
But during a behind-the-scenes visit to the set of Bridge Of Lies, hosted by Ross Kemp , I was quickly served a slice of humble pie
For the fan-favorite game show, I was put in a team of five to complete the final bridge.
I stood along the railings as I watched my first two fellow compeтιтors take on the wave – and all was plain sailing until we got to the third row.
Faced with three lies and one truth, we were given four statements: ‘Singer Dionne Warwick was born in Warwick’, ‘the poop deck is located at the rear of a ship’, ‘adults have more canines than incisor teeth’ and ‘the Madagascar character King Julien is a flying squirrel’.
Our first teammate chose option four and was sent off the bridge to make way for our third contender.
By now, I would usually be screaming at the TV, begging people to use their common sense.
But instead, I felt like a deer in headlights. I stood still and quietly suggested to my remaining team mates that the answer was the boat.
My third teammate chose option three and was also sent packing.
After Ross called me up, I no longer felt like a deer in headlights, but more like a domestic cat on a rubber dingy.
And after watching the filming of an upcoming celebrity episode, I was in a frenzy when well-established music icons couldn’t spout simple trivia about the UK top 40s
In hindsight, this should have been my first clue that when you are put face-to-face with Ross in the studio, your confidence, knowledge and ability to think simply wash away
As I stood under the studio lights opposite the documentary creator, my legs started to buckle as I waited to be called.
Thankful to be wearing a long dress, I could feel my knees shaking away as I nervously crossed the brightly-lit stage.
Contemplating my decisions, I questioned where I ever got the audacity to shout at the TV for the last ten years.
Feeling a glimmer of ᴀssurance, I told Ross I was going with my gut feeling about the boat statement.
Alas, the team moved on, and I soon moved on to the next level, which I pᴀssed with ease.
But, it was the fifth row that really caught me out and it really shouldn’t have.
I was faced with four statements, ‘the all-time best-selling film soundtrack is ‘Dirty Dancing’, ‘a cryptograph measures Bitcoin value’, ‘bats have belly ʙuттons’ and Lenny Henry found fame on Opportunity Knocks’.
Feeling the pressure, my team and I ran through each option.
With my fellow teammates collaborating answers and the wave quickly coming down, I ran to the final choice.
As I walked over to the glaringly-obvious wrong choice, I asked myself, ‘have I seen a bat with a bellyʙuттon?’
To be transparent I have never seen a bat in person – and I don’t recall ever seeing a movie, other than Scooby-Doo, that featured one either.
So why I used this as my reference point of knowledge, I have no idea, clearly common sense had deserted me.
To clarify, a bat is a mammal and does not lay eggs, so it obviously has a belly ʙuттon— this is primary school knowledge, if not nursery.
It is safe to say I was utterly embarrᴀssed and I hung my head in shame.
In fact, I was so ashamed that I couldn’t even look Ross in the eye.
I must admit that the whole experience was exhilarating, but it is impossible to think when Ross lifts an eyebrow and smirks at you while your wrack your brain.
After narrowing down the options from four to three, our fourth teammate tackled the question – but also got it wrong.
After the very humbling experience on Bridge of Lies, I think I will be sitting quietly sipping a cup of tea with a biscuit in the future
It is not, I repeat, NOT as easy as it looks and I will forever remember that bats have a belly ʙuттon… useful information, I’m sure
If this were a traditional game, our team would have gone home with no money, no victory and no glory.
But we had a fifth contestant who was given a 50/50 chance and thankfully chose the bat option. before going on to answer the final answer correctly.
After the very humbling experience on Bridge of Lies, I think I will be sitting quietly sipping a cup of tea with a biscuit in the future.
It is not, I repeat, NOT as easy as it looks and I will forever remember that bats have a belly ʙuттon… useful information, I’m sure.
Celebrity Bridge of Lies returns to BBC One and iPlayer for a brand new series on Saturday 3 May.